Just a little fill-in/catch-up since my last post:

Up until about a week ago, JD had chosen not to drink at all – and during that time — things were starting to feel optimistic!

Don’t get me wrong – celebration time is far from happening!  We just are seeing small steps in the right direction.

THEN……JD fished for me to say it was okay for him to start with a few casuals.  Fishing means: he calls on his way home from work and asks if I need him to pick up anything?  And if I don’t answer the way he wants me to, he then asks if there is ANYTHING else that I would like him to pick up.

I know this trick!  So, I tell him this is a decision that is not mine!  This is something that only he can know what is best.  Am I afraid of him starting and following the same patterns?  YES!  He said he is too and knows what to look out for.  And I tell him again that this only something he can make a decision on.

So he purchased some beer that night.  Drank only a couple.  But the only drinking a couple was taking place every night.  The consistency has started again.  And not only that, the sleeping difficulties and extreme acid reflux has been present too.  On Monday (8/23/10) JD mentioned that after his birthday (8/25) he wanted to do a no drinking again.

The next day (8/24) JD’s brother came to town.  He was leaving for out-of-town early Wed. morning and JD was taking him to the airport (6:30am).

That evening JD had WAY too much to drink.  He was also VERY loud.  Both in his talking and laughing.  The kids commented about it to me and said they didn’t like how loud Dad was being.  JD ended up drinking so much that he threw up later in the evening.  He says he made himself due to having such a bad stomach ache.  But who cares what caused him to throw up!?  The fact is: he did!

Woke early Wed. morning, took his brother to the airport, came back home to open his birthday gifts, told me that I don’t need to say anything – he knows he drank too much and left for work.

Came home early to go out to dinner for his birthday.  Said he was only going to have a few.  Started drinking beer before we left for dinner.  Ended up consuming 3 beers in about an hours time.  Went out to dinner and he ordered 3 more CC’s and water.  He was drinking water because after the 3 beers, he vasodilation started.

Dinner didn’t go that great!  Our 20 mos. old was not very easy.  We left the resturant and needed to get some things at Sports Authority.  During the time at the store, JD received a disturbing phone call from his sister and proceeded to take the call while in the store.   Again, being very loud while on the phone in the store – a bit embarrasing to have all the customers hear a conversation that should be private.  A conversation that entails jail, turning her in, drugs, gambling, etc.-things that the general public really don’t need to hear about.

And to top it off – he’s had quite a few in a small amount of time.

Thurs. – no drinking.

Today: Friday – I was out shopping with our daughter for the evening.  JD was home with MJ and Scott.  And he was drinking.  I called a couple of times and could tell by his speech that he had been drinking.  When I came home, he was in Scott’s bedroom and I could tell by just looking at him that he had more than just a few.

MJ was sleeping in his crib, door open and no p.j.’s on.  He only had the shirt he was wearing during the day and his diaper.  Something we have NEVER done.

So here I am – NOT celebrating!!


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