Been Too Long!

I know it has been a VERY long time since my last post.  I have been to the site and ready to post….but found it very overwhelming due to how much has transpired.  But I have had many wonderful individuals reach out and ask how things are going.  So…..in many following posts I will give updates.  Making sure I have all the events in a correct timeline order.

However, I will give a brief update as to how I’m/we are doing overall.

This past year has been, overall, good!  I’m going to bulletpoint the good and bad and then write specific posts regarding each area.  (Of course not all at once:)

I’m starting off with the bad, because I want to leave on a good note.

The Bad:

  • JD is still on prescription medication.
  • Our fighting has escalated to a new (not good) level. (Less fighting though.)
  • My anger has increased to a not-so-good level.
  • JD’s level of energy and sleeping is still an issue.
  • Business has suffered as a result.
  • Have uncovered more theft from employees at our business.
  • Our marriage almost came to an end.
  • Past hurts with family continue to creep in. (From the neighbors and family from CA.)
  • I have struggled with my faith very deeply.  This past year I feel as though I have questioned my faith more than ever.
  • Both of our health has declined and life is catching up to us at a very fast pace.

The Good:

  • We are still together/married!
  • We have been going to Christian marriage counseling.
  • We are in the process of selling one of our companies.
  • We don’t fight as much.
  • War room was created (in an closet in the office/schoolroom)
  • JD’s time with The Lord & faith has skyrocketed.
  • JD uses the War Room pretty much daily.
  • JD has surrendered and continues to strive for a better life.
  • Communication and contact has happened with family members who we have had the strained relationship with for the last 6ish years.
  • JD & I communicate WAY more.
  • I see a light at the end of the tunnel.
  • We are in the mode of simplifying.  Focusing on what God’s plans are for us.

Well….that is pretty much “in a nutshell” of what I will continue to write/post in more detail.  As you can see, God does answer prayers and I have quite a bit of “good” on my list.

As I was sitting here thinking, I asked myself the question: Why have I not posted much and how come it has been so long?

Well…..I do know I have been over-the-top busy with everything, but that still is not an excuse!  I mean…..I have time to Candy Crush – right?!

I came to this conclusion: When things are going good – or better – our human nature is to not go deeper, to let off the gas.  Kind of like when life is going good, we tend to not dive into The Lord as much.  We tend to not go to the well for help as much.  For me, this is not a good thing!  For me, I need to develop the habit of consistency.  Consistency helps to maintain balance.  And it’s also really important to document and remember the times that are going good and to reflect with thanksgiving on these times as well.

I hope each and everyone of you can find pease this Christmas!

Over this past year my theme has been: “Let It Go!”  (Yes, I too start singing the Disney song:). But really……..I have grown in this area so much.  It has not been easy!!!!  I like to have control!  I like to control things, situations and outcomes!!  So to “Let It Go” 0r “Let Go & Let God!” – this has truly been a lifesaver.  Because to be honest, I never had the final say: He did!  I had, and still have to, trust like I’ve never trusted before.  One thing we learned (among many things) in counseling is: You are responsible 2 – not 4 (and you can fill in the blank).  So…..you are responsible 2 your husband, not 4 him.  You are responsible 2 your family members, not 4 them.

Have a Blessed Christmas!

Alli

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4 responses to “Been Too Long!

  • BalanceMyBeing

    Wow! You are truly an inspiration. Looks like you are definitely heading in the right direction (toward God). I am adding you to my prayer wall in my War Room because we have to keep each other lifted up. The individual battles can be rough, oh but we WILL be victorious once the war is over and it’s all because of Christ Jesus. Merry Christmas to you and your beautiful family.

    • wivesforchrist

      Thank you for your very kind words AND adding me/us to your prayer wall in your War Room! YES, love the statement of keeping each other lifted up and being victorious with Jesus Christ!!
      Yes, the individual battles are very rough. Addiction has a nasty way of keeping “everyone” involved thinking they are SO alone and defeated! This is precisely why we named it: “The beast!” And we WILL have victory over it!
      I had not written in quite some time because so much was happening – both good and bad. I began posting so many years ago as a way to privately journal (one in which no one in my home would ever come across), to vent and then I became aware that I was indeed not alone! I too had searched the internet trying to find other Christians who had such darkness in their lives. But there was so much out there which said to LEAVE! Don’t put up with it, such a bleak outlook, etc. – so I started blogging. And realized I was NOT alone! And sharing the battle with others does make it lighter.
      Christmas and New Years was nice! Hope you had a blessed time as well!
      We are doing OK right now. Dealing with prescription addiction is also very frustrating! However, my husband so desires to be free from it all. We are actually starting a radical program for detoxing. But he needs to be off the drugs for a minimum of 72 hours. The withdrawals are horrendous and he is scared out of his mind. He’s been at this point once before, but didn’t get good medical information and started back on them as per a doctors recommendation. That’s another long story. So……I’m going to battle (literally) next week!
      Hope you are doing well!
      Please let me know any prayer requests you have! We need an army of prayer warriors!
      Blessings!
      Alli

  • Dustin

    Hello, My name is DM I will call myself. My wife is an alcoholic and pathological liar, Maybe from the alcohol. I don’t want to leave her I want it to work. we too are christians as well. Your posts are so very helpful to me as there are very few posts out there that actually want you stay with your alcoholic spouse. I think this life is very short and this is not our home and I want to be there for my spouse and not just give up on them. Well I am not sure how to keep seeing your blogs or get updates when you post. My email address is dustinmammen@hotmail.com I would love to continue to read your blog and want to also given you much props on sticking it out despite I am sure what most people around you are saying. Thanks again.

    • wivesforchrist

      Hi DM!
      Thanks for your kind words regarding sticking it out! It IS so very hard to continue on what seems to be such a grind. Just “today” I was thinking to my self: “I can’t do this anymore! Why am I still continuing to do this – year-after-year!” My husband does not drink anymore. However, he is addicted to prescription drugs. An epidemic in and of itself!! The darkness this all brings is sometimes so overwhelming!
      But…….just when I have these thoughts of giving up – I get a message from you:) And it causes me to take a deep breath and remember that I am married to my husband which is a very sacred covenant between us and God. And I know my husband is a good man, and I’m dealing with “the beast” of addictions! And to keep fighting the good fight!
      So……THANK YOU DM! I will pray for you and your wife!
      There is a subscribe to feed, I think it’s located at the bottom of the page. This will alert you of any new postings.
      Blessings!
      Alli

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