The Battlefield

Okay, so most of you that have read through my postings, know that our battle with “The beast” is with prescription medications which my husband is currently on, and has been taking for a number of years.  This has such a huge affect mentally, physically and emotionally that it has to change.  We have researched the best ways to accomplish this, but the process is very scary!

Through perseverance, boundaries (one’s in which my husband and myself have made and stuck to), faith, fights (yep!), and by the grace of God…….we have been able to keep the alcohol under control!  I can honestly say that we (at this date in time) do not have the issues with alcohol addiction.  But that doesn’t mean it can’t rear it’s ugly head at any given time.  But my husband is so much aware of his addictive nature and also does not want it in the house.  Praise be given to the Lord for answered prayers in this area!!

But the addiction is with prescription medications.  At this time we are on a plan to detox from the medications.  If any of you have had any experience with this, you know the absolute nightmare that is about to take place.

Fortunately, my husband is so much on board with this, I’m at least not fighting him on the wishes to be rid of this evil!  He wants it just as bad as I do.  But he is scared to death of this process!!  He has been here once before, lasted 28 days and the guilt of not going any further haunts him every day.  But at that point, the depression that set in scared me to the point that I was so fearful of his well-being.  Currently, I’m on my knees that I can be as helpful as I can be.  Sometimes, well…..most of the time, my patience runs very short during these processes.  And I become very irritable as well!  We both know that I am a crucial part of his detox.  He needs me to be patient and as supportive as I can be.  I too know that I need to be.  Because fighting at this point of the process does not help us get to the end of the race.

I am convinced that prescription medications are an epidemic in our society right now.  Most of us don’t even know just how many are suffering as a result of how readily available these medications are.  It’s a silent killer!!  And it robs everyone involved of the joys in life and has so many consequences.  I have learned so much about this area, that I’m fairly convinced the Lord will use it for his glory.  God never wastes a hurt….right!

I just returned on Monday from a weekend away with my daughter.  We went to West Monroe, LA to a Heartfelt conference where Ms. K Robertson was speaking (among many other incredible Godly women).  This was such a needed time for me to prepare myself for the weeks to come!  Hearing her story, yet again, about how she never gave up on her husband was so needed for me as I enter this phase.  I still maintain the steadfastness of NOT giving up on my husband or our marriage.

Now…..if you would have asked me last week – might have been a different thought process.  I was yet again, at my wits end with this addiction and how it has stolen so much!!  But as we all know, there are valleys and peaks in this journey.  And right now, I have to dig my feet into the foundation of Jesus Christ to be as faithful of a wifely servant as I possibly can!  But I know without a shadow of a doubt that God has a bigger plan and that plan does mean trials.

So I welcome this battle!  And I pray that I will be strong, through the will of God, to see this addiction come to an end and be beat with the glory and grace of God!!  I KNOW God has a bigger plan!!

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2 responses to “The Battlefield

  • fromthepromiseland

    So happy for you that your husband is embracing this process. My husband keeps putting it off. It is heartbreaking for me. He is down to taking 3mgs a day, but he is ensnared by subs. He just wants to feel normal but his normal isn’t real life normal. He can go off them when we are home. Right now we are having an extended stay with his family, where he knows how and where to get his drugs. When we go home to a different state he doesn’t have access. But I want him to get clean because he wants and can get clean, not because he is forced to. It is a lose-lose situation as when he is off the subs he is depressed and severely suicidal. We are in financial straits because of his addiction. I need support and am really glad I found this site.

    • wivesforchrist

      It does sound like your husband is also desiring to be off Subs! That’s awesome! I know we had to wait for the “right” time as well. This was so very frustrating because we both know the burning desire to be rid of this but also knew the process. And being we had done this once before, about 3 years ago, we knew just how tormenting it can be. YES! The depression is so severe and the suicide thoughts are so incredibly scary! I encouraged him to go back on them (the 1st time) because it was SO bad…..it literally scared me. His well-being and safety! Such a snare! Yep….he was spending so much money on these because insurance doesn’t cover it. I can let you know the process in which we used to accomplish what we have so far. I would only do this as a source for you to start researching it, because it’s a bit unconventional! We had looked into something called ibogaine, but this scared us both due to a weird spiritual effect that happens. It’s not legal in U.S. so you have to go to a country that it is legal in. There are health risks and it is very expensive. But I have done A LOT of research and it is intriguing! But it scares us to even possibly allow the spiritual level they discuss into play! Not worth it to us because that is truly something you can’t recover from.
      We have done much research on Subs and detoxing. It’s a long process. And I know the time right now will be different because of my husbands stronger faith! This is without a doubt one of the biggest aspects of the success! Yes…..many non-believers are successful in detoxing. But to have the hope and strength of God and resting in that place is crucial! Sweetie…..YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
      Blessings!
      Alli

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